Living With Your Significant Other

My feller and I have been living with one another for almost 6 months, and have adjusted our daily lives and personal lifestyles accordingly. In this endeavor, I’m sure that he and I, and all of us who live with our partner’s have experienced and recognized that it’s not as easy or all-the-time-exciting as we thought. But there are ways to combat these feelings that can help keep the sharing of life together healthy, happy and still exciting. 

MAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER’S SPACE

• As fun as a 6 month sleepover or roommate that may turn into a forever housemate may sound, it can get pretty difficult! It’s crucial to be aware of each other’s physical, emotional and mental needs. Sometimes alone time is a necessity to keep things in the relationship full of rainbows and butterflies—and that’s okay. Now that you’re working together, cooking together, and everything else together, a light and spacious area can start to feel teeny tiny. Make time to take a break from each other, to rejuvenate on your own, to continue to fuel your personal needs and hobbies. Not everything has to happen as a couple. Sometimes it’s better to get in your alone time. 

HAVE THOSE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS

• Now that you’re spending all of your waking time together, it can start to feel hard to constantly bring up your feelings or intrusive thoughts. Sometimes we all need time alone to sort out what’s going on in their heads; but often, we just need a listener ear and strong shoulder. You two are different people; you don’t have to love the same things or morph into each other to keep enjoying life together; but sometimes those are conversations that need to be had. It’s a great idea to start getting all of your fears/anxieties out in the open. Not everything is going to be perfect or happy all the time. As partners, there should be mutual understanding that moodiness, sadness, and bad days are bound to happen. As well as bad days, annoying habits and lifestyles can get in the way of our routines need to be discussed as well. Talk about all of it, be open, honest and communicative—it’s there to help. 

FIND A WAY TO REALLY SPEND TIME TOGETHER 

• Living together means that you’re seeing each other’s faces day-in and day-out. It can be easy to blur the lines between constantly seeing each other to genuinely spending time together. Be sure to make the effort to make and maintain that distinction! Carving out time to create a date night or to just do something different than your regular routines can help keep the spark alive. It maintains the fun of being together. Talk regularly with each other about what you’d like to do for a change. A switch from a day-to-day routine can help relax the both of you.

RESPECT THE STRUGGLE 

• Once it was exciting to wake up to your S/O every morning and share your day with them; now it’s difficult, distracting, and maybe even boring. That’s okay too. Just like relationships have bumps in the road, quarantining together will too. Respect each other’s space, needs, wants, and even expectations. Patience is key to the ever evolving pandemic conditions and living conditions, as well as continually adjusting to each other. It won’t be like this forever, but for now, it’s important to just respect each other and the space you share. It can be daunting, but it can also be exciting again. Talking to each other, listening to each other, and being there for each other is all bound to help the situation. 

At the end of the day, these memories will end up being ones that everyone will look back on and enjoy, so we should all try to continue to enjoy the time now.